Wednesday 7 March 2012

Identifying my STRENGTHS

I have been reading a lot lately about how to find love.  A number of articles have suggested that when you are in periods where you feel lonely and are yearning for love and more friendship it's a good time to work on yourself.  So I am engaging with that advice.  I am completing my studies - whether I want to work in this area I don't know - but now is not the time for big decisions.  My body is depleted, exhausted and I need to nurture myself.  Apart from my formal studies my personal studies have included identifying my strengths - positive psychology tells us that it's a far easier path to happiness to know and build on your strengths rather than try to change your weaknesses.  In fact I have been told that life is too short to become strong in your weaknesses - I'm not sure that I agree 100% with that, but I do see the good in building on strengths.  So using this exercise I have identified that my strengths are:

Analytical - I am a problem solver and I challenge people (at times incessantly), no doubt this can be annoying, but apparently it's also a strength!
Learner - I am a researcher (resource investigator), I'm like a ferret with it and often the outcome of the learning is less significant than the getting there.
Relater - This is a key aspect of my personality - I require intimate, deep and genuine friendships - at the extreme end of this 'strength', I find it hard to meet new friends and survive the getting to know you stage, in order to build the depth that I yearn for.  I am truly happy with a few close friends and partner - alas I don't have enough of any of these at the moment.
Empathy/Insightful - I don't know that I do this with everyone, probably more with the underdogs in our society.  I do volunteer work with men in a forensic mental health hospital and I feel such empathy for some of the men there I want to hug them.
Responsibility - I am dependable and feel emotionally bound to do what I say I'll do, I can become very disappointed and upset when others don't show me the same courtesy - but this is about STRENGTHS. 
Competition - this is the one that put me over the limit of five and I was going to leave it out - I see my competitiveness as the root cause of so much of my jealousy, envy, bitterness and unhappiness (I am fixated with others performance - they're success at having a family when I have failed etc etc.) - but I can also see that it is in some respects what gives me hope and keeps me going.  Somehow I'll do better than them in some other way.....I can hardly write that without cringing - it seems so wrong, but it's on the list as a strength.
Living simply and keeping things simple - this wasn't on the list but it's a core belief of mine and I had to include it.  No matter how much I earn I always maintain my simple lifestyle. Yes, I know, I'm now up to seven.

What are your strengths??  I'd love to know.

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